I am considering....

(Hey, look!  Another post that isn't just a photo-a-day!  So rare!  So special!)

I am considering...going back to facebook. 

I know, shocking, right? 

It's been almost a year.  (I believe it will be a year in April?  I don't know...close to it, if not...)  And the break has been...well, amazing.  It was just so good to take some time away and focus on myself.  I have relished not being able to compare my daily life to that of my friends.  It makes me feel more positive about where I am. 

But, at the same time...I feel like I'm missing out on a lot.  My friends are having babies (Congrats Janey!!!!) and getting married and I find out about it like way after the fact.  Plus - sometimes I think of someone and want to reach out and say hi when I realize "Oh....I don't have their email address....or their cell number apparently..." And though maybe we aren't that good of friends if that's the case....I still would like to send 'em a hello.

If I do go back, I think I'll probably lay low for a little while...try to limit my time on it.  Because it really is nice not having that constant craziness of updates in my life.  (I have twitter...and that I can like, totally leave and come back and feel fine...I feel like that's sort of good enough!  It's just....not all my friends are on twitter.)

I'm torn.  I want to go back, but I don't.  But I do.  But I don't. 

Plus it's really fun to tell people I don't have facebook.  The reaction is always amusing.  Why is it so shocking to not be on this one particular social network?  And yet...it is shocking.  Because everyone and their mom (quite literally) is on it. 

I haven't made my decision yet...and if I do go back, it probably won't be until April/May because I'm determined to make sure I go a year without it.  :) 

I should write a book called "My Year Without Facebook".  Would you read it?  Would facebook let me advertise on their site? 

I want to know your thoughts, dear reader.  Can I survive without it in a world where facebook is rapidly becoming our primary means of communication with those not on our speeddial?  Are the friends I cannot contact at the moment worth giving up my peace and quiet for?  WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!  (Sorry, generational outburst....remember when we used to call our friends if we wanted to tell them something?  Or better yet, ring their doorbells and ask if they could come out and play?  Well, those days are over folks.)

Hello out there.

Hi.

I just wanted to say hi because...it feels like the only things I post on my blog now are my daily photos and you don't really get to hear from ME. 

I mean, yes, there's a caption for each photo but it's never more than a paragraph.  And I think to myself, that isn't why I started a blog.  For a paragraph a day.  Or a sentence or two.  It was so I would have an outlet.  A place to open up.  A place to VENT.  A place to share.  A place for all my quirks and thoughts to come out into the open.

And yeah, sometimes my photos can do that.  But they don't really get to tell you how I'm feeling about, say, The Occupy Wall Street Movement.  Or my most recent vacation.  Or that conversation I had with that person about that thing.  I don't know.  I feel like I'm not telling you anything.

Am I telling you anything?

Whatever, I'm just saying.  I'm still here.  And I'm going to try to write more.  Like say more.  To you.  My readers.  If you're still out there.  :)

Loves.

Privacy

I can't decide if I want to make my blog public again, or keep it private.

I keep hearing of all these people who read it before and they're all sad they can't anymore...I tell them to just give me their email address and I'll add them, but they forget or what have you and...I don't know. I just felt strange having my world/inner most thoughts on display but...then why did I have a blog at all if I had an issue with that?

I don't know.

What do you think?

The News You've All Been Waiting For...

Not really.

Do you ever feel like your blog post is just anti-climactic? I read my friend's blogs and they're all "We just found out...IT'S A GIRL!", "Big news...WE'RE ENGAGED!", "Guess what...WE'RE MOVING!", "You were all asking...PICTURES FROM THE HONEYMOON". "I'm so relieved...I GOT A NEW JOB!".

Do I need any more examples? You get the idea.

And here I am like..."I went home to Pittsburgh for Christmas!" "Look at this funny picture of my face!" "It's snowing!" "Complain complain complain".

. . .

I'm totally lame.

My life seems so small and insignificant sometimes. Especially now. My job is nothing important. I'm completely replacable. I audition for shows...I get callbacks...and never get cast. I feel untalented and unwanted. My jeans are a little tight. I'm totally not cute anymore.

I mean, I see what posts get attention and what posts don't...big news, something dramatic, something exciting: Comments. Me just rambling: Not so chatty. I'm not fishing for blog comments here, but I'm just saying...

Is my purpose in life this menial? Is my daily life so mundane?

Sigh...I don't know, cyber world... Blogs are cool and I'm glad I have you faithful readers out there who like to peek in on me from time to time. But sometimes I take a step back and just think, "This is so lame".

Not lame like "blogs are dumb", but lame like "look at what's important for me to write down". I mean, shouldn't I blog about something important? Save the Whales! Adopt a Puppy...and then NEUTER IT! Recycle!!!

I fully support all those ideas. But why don't I write about them? And if I did, would you even wanna read it? I am all for good deeds and stuff, but I don't know how often I'd want to read about it.

Anywho...I'm off to save the office from disorganization.

Lovies to you, dear readers!

Peace.