BOYS

Boys are so selfish and so manipulative! And it dates back to the beginning of time. They are greedy to the point of stupidity with no care of the consequences. And it makes me so MAD. Can't they LEARN that women don't appreciate it? Don't they see what it does to their lives and the people around them? STUPID BOYS.

And I swear this is not directed at anyone in particular. And it's not brought on by any particular event. But I see evidence of it EVERYWHERE.

Boys...can't live with 'em; can't live without 'em. Though I'm obviously attempting it.

Walkies!

I'm lazy. I'm just a lazy person. I like to sit on the couch and watch movies. That's what I like to do. I don't like walking. And when you live in New York, you do a lot of walking. And I don't like it.

But today, after running some errands (and walking a lot), I felt the urge to take the puppies out for a walk. Now, if you've met my dogs, you know the excitement of going outside almost causes puppy heart attacks. And they were so happy to go outside. And it made me happy to make them happy. And so we walked and walked and Scout just ran and ran and Charley mostly sat in my arms since he can hardly walk. But I could tell that they were just so grateful to get outside and sniff and run and play.

Ahh, the simple joys of puppy life.

Walkies made my day today.

Ouch.

I burned the palm of my hand today. Like an idiot.

Have you ever seen that episode of Grey's Anatomy where the chick burns her hand on a soup pot? Yeah. I did that. Except mine didn't blister and crap cause I immediately let go, where as the girl on Grey's held on because she was doing it on purpose.

But really...it hurt. Bad. And I had to keep ice and cold water running on it for about 4 hours before it finally calmed down.

This is when I hate living by myself. Because there was nobody around to ask if I was ok. And that stinks.

And so, I ask myself... "Lauren, are you ok?"

Yeah, yeah...I'm ok.

Trying To Stay Calm

I'm slowly going insane. Honestly. I think I'm slowly going insane.

I do not like all this alone time I have to think. To think about things that seem so far away and that I cannot grasp. And I'm going insane with all the dwelling and all the worrying and all the fear and all the frustration. And...yeah.

On the bright side, I think I'm doing OK with my weight loss-y-ness. I still have a ways to go...and I need to be more pro-active about it. But I'm making a few rules for myself and trying my best to abide by them! I just need to prepare for when my Mom comes to town and I want to indulge. I need to be a good girl.

So...I don't know, maybe I can try focusing more on the weight loss instead of on all the insane-ness. But...the insane-ness just never leaves my head.

I need a new head. And a new body.

I need new stuff.

Buh-bye Chubs!

I can't even tell you how many times I have tried to lose those stubborn 10ish pounds that I carry around with me. And I can't ever seem to follow through with it and just DO it.

So...I've decided I'm gonna make myself follow through with it. That's something new for me. Ha.

Hopefully, I can have these...I'm going to say 12 pounds off by...the middle of March! That's going to be my goal. March 15.

So, you are my witness. And if you see me around, make sure I'm not eating anything but like...fruits and veggies. And lean proteins.

:)

Inspired by a shoebox...

My birthday was last month. A family friend of mine wrapped my giftcard in a shoebox he had lying around. Inside the box was a sheet with these wise words printed on it:

Stand for something.

Don't fit in.

Don't scream out.

Walk that line between classic and modern, cool and comfortable.

Make the rules work for you...or make your own set of rules.

Don't settle.

This is the age of the individual.

...and it said some other stuff about shoes...but that's not the point...these little things...you could apply them to buying shoes, sure. Or...you could just live by them.

I want to live by these things. I want to be an individual.

I want to write on my blog more often...sorry for the delay...to...anyone...who may actually read this. G'night, all.